Ruth: Life is full of fabulous surprises

Wow, it's great to come home and Marolyn has been a domestic and IT goddess. Dishes done, dinner made and brand new blog up and running.

One day after our first round of inseminating and the feeling is...intoxicating. Yesterday I was so positive I was pregnant. We insemmed for the last time that morning and I'm sure I ovulated soon after. I went to work but my head was swimming and I felt like I really needed to lie down. So I grabbed a contract I needed to read and parked myself on the couch. I swear I felt these mini explosions in my tummy area. I was convinced it was the moment of conception. Then again it could have been gas. My boss lies on the couch all the time but I felt kind of self concious. It felt like too much was going on for me do anything else but lie there.

Today I felt more grounded and a little nauseous. Part of me was like "I feel pregnant already?" but really I'm just tired and at this early stage I won't even have pregnancy hormones.

No matter how this cycle turns out I feel like I've learnt so much from all the massive feelings I had during the insemination time. I'm really grateful I worked through those. We got a lot of support - from our gorgeous neighbours, our families, a wonderful friend who came over and gave us massages and some energy work...not to mention the fabulous donor himself who put up with his least favourite things (intense female emotions) and still delivered in style.

The mercedes we were hoping to buy to convert to vegie oil auctioned for $1000 over our maximum bid. I guess we'll just keep looking. I'm keen to buy soon so we don't lose the momentum we both felt in L.A.

Life feels very exciting and new right now. Insemination is a huge part of that but it's also returning from the States with plans to move there, both getting new opportunities at work, the vegie oil car revolution and the spiritual energy and healing experiences I've had lately. It's like the top has blown off my previous expectations of my life and the possibilities feel infinite.

I was taking a charting test for fertility friend and it was asking about the phases of the menstrual cycle. The correct answer was: menses, follicular, ovulation, luteal. An alternative answer given on the multichoice made me laugh, it said: menses, enthusiasm, optimism, anxiety. I guess I'm firmly in the optimism phase right now and who knows what tomorrow will bring.